Tuesday, May 1, 2007

Project SCOBY Doo Update: Casey's Plankton Agenda

Casey and Galina Serin enjoy plankton and kombucha
After further laboratory analysis Stanislaus County Mosquito & Vector Control confirms that only the spa was used to develop the SUV-sized kombucha mushroom. Serin was using the pool to cultivate enough plankton to combat global warming and, of course, make ALOT™ of money in the process. He had hoped to out-plankton Planktos and grow a floating field of plankton on a par with his enormous kombucha seized by Vector Control. Sadly, Casey’s plan to become a leading “Silicon Valley technocrat” as detailed in today's New York Times article came to an abrupt halt with the Muncy foreclosure.
Can plankton help save the planet?
Some Silicon Valley technocrats are betting that it just might. In an effort to ameliorate the effects of global warming, several groups are working on ventures to grow vast floating fields of plankton intended to absorb carbon dioxide from the atmosphere and carry it to the depths of the ocean. It is an idea, debated by experts for years, that still sounds like science fiction — and some scholars think that is where it belongs.

Quick-on-his-toes-Casey realized there are plenty of “ponds and stuff” to be utilized in the same manner as the Muncy lab; hence, his latest hippie van plan.


Leonard said...

Nigel Swaby is the biggest looser in the entire blogosphere. Sad guy, but it ain't my problem as long as the chat boxes are turned off.
He can shove his goddamned Olympic pin up his a$$hole. It shouldn't take all dat much jelly.

soemdood said...

So I guess we all know what is in the never-left-behind murse, now:

I'd guess it's a .38 special and $258,312.79 of ill-gotten proceeds, hmmm?

That's enough for you to keep the fun blog story going and as Galina says, "pull money out of your butt" for a long time further.

BTW, I could care less if you mod this post, because it is also going to be cross posted to every Casey Haterz™ site anyway, so you posting it and also replying to it here is probably your best bet. But you never take good advice anyway, so you likely will ignore that , too.

I sure hope a Russian friend doesn't decide that they are a bit hungrier, low key, and more physical than you, and go for the murse.

ASW: craziness, indeed!

flailing forward said...

Sure, saving the earth is noble and all, but you've got to think bigger. Hallucinogenic plankton research is where it's at.

Casey may be a slow starter, but he certainly knows a golden email nugget when he sees one. He has seen the future, and the future is narco-plankton.